Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Domestic Violence - Tips for Children - Australia

If you live in a home where there is a lot of violence, it can be very upsetting and frightening.  Violence in the home is always wrong and it's never your fault.  These tips might help you learn more about how to stay safe, what to do, types of violence and how to get help if you are being hurt.


Violence at Home Can Make You Feel Bad

The violence at home may be directed at your mother and you may see this happening.  The violence may also be towards you.  This is called child abuse.  It can make you feel really sad and awful.  Often children think they have something to cause the violence in their family.  This is not true, but sometimes you might:
  • Blame yourself for the violence
  • Feel frightened, sad, ashamed, confused or unhappy
  • Feel sick, have stomach pains or headaches
  • Stop eating or not feel like eating
  • Cry a lot
  • Sleep badly or have nightmares or wet the bed
  • Find school difficult
  • Lose interest in your school work or your friends
  • Take drugs or alcohol to cope
  • Feel like running away
  • Feel angry and want to hurt yourself or somebody else or to smash something
  • Have trouble talking - for example, you might stutter
  • Worry about your mother's safety
Types of Violence

Family violence can mean lots of different things - it's not just being hit.  There are different kinds of violence that can happen in the home.  The violence may be directed at your mother, at the children only, or at the children and mother.  Some examples of violence that may affect you are:
  • Physical Violence-someone hurting you by hitting, slapping, shoving, pushing, biting, kicking or burning you.  Someone throwing or breaking things in your home.  Seeing your mother or brother or sister hurt or threatened in any of these ways.  Someone hurting your pets.
  • Verbal Violence - someone hurting you by telling mean and nasty things at you, calling you rude names, or shouting or talking to you in a scary or threatening way.  Hearing someone speak to your mother like this.
  • Sexual Violence - someone hurting you by touching private parts of your body when you do not want them to, touching you in a sexual way or forcing you to have sex.
  • Neglect - someone hurting you by not giving you care, food, clean things, safety, clothing and love.
If You Think You are Being Abused or See Your Mother Being Abused

There are important things you should remember if you think that you, your mother or anyone in your family is being abused.  These include:
  • Someone may try to make you feel ashamed or guilty about what is happening.  You are not to blame for something they have done wrong.  It is not your fault and it's not a special secret.
  • Don't believe them if they say something bad will happen to you if you tell; there are people who can help you.
  • It is an unsafe secret to keep: it's okay to tell someone and it will help you or your mother to be safe
  • Nothing is so awful that it can't be talked about
  • Help is available
Tell Someone About Family Violence and Abuse at Home

You can report family violence at home and get help in many ways:
  • Find someone who you trust to tell (perhaps a neighbour, a teacher or a friend's mother).
  • Tell a trusted adult who can keep you safe and help stop the abuse at home.
  • Take your time and try to explain how you or your mother has been hurt.  It may be very difficult or scary for you to tell and it may be hard for you to find the right words to explain.  Just do the best you can to explain.
  • Try using the phone, writing things down, drawing a picture or sending an email - lots of people find talking face-to-face very difficult, not just kids.
  • If the person hurting you or your mother is someone in your family, you may feel safer if you tell someone outside your family - like your teacher or a Kids Help Line counsellor (see Where to get help below).
Staying Safe

There are ways that you can stay safe including:
  • Talk to people - find someone you can trust and who will listen to you.  It might be someone in your family, your friends' parents, a cousellor, your teacher, the police or another trusted adult.  They will help protect you.
  • Keep on telling different people - if your problem is not being fixed, keep telling people until you feel safe.
  • Remember that your body belongs to you - no one should touch any part of your body in a way that makes you feel scared or confused or hurt.  This includes your private parts.  It is okay to tell someone to stop if they are touching you in a way that hurts or makes you uncomfortable.
  • Know the difference between safe and unsafe touching - some touching is friendly and helpful such as hugging, holding hands with a friend, play wrestling with your brother or giving your sister a shoulder massage.
Where to Get Help
  • Kids Help Line counsellors Tel. 1800 551 800 or get help via the Internet www.kidshelp.com.au   
  • Police Tel. 000
  • Child Protection CrisisLine: Department of Human Services.  24 hour service Tel. 131 278
  • Trusted family member or friend
  • Teacher, school counsellor or trusted adult
Things to Remember
  • Family violence is never your fault
  • Learn how to stay safe
  • Get help by telling someone about the problem
Original Article

There are various types of domestic violence tactics and abuses.

In an domestic violence abusive relationship, the abuser may use a number of tactics to maintain power and control over his or her partner: Domestic Violence using Verbal Abuse:
  • Name Calling
  • Threatening
  • Intimidating
Domestic Violence using Emotional Abuse:
  • Criticizing
  • Displaying jealousy
  • Using public humiliation
  • Putting down the partner
  • Isolating
  • Dominating
  • Using the Children
Domestic Violence using Financial Abuse:
  • Controlling the money
  • Concealing joint assets or shared money
  • Keeping their partner impoverished
  • Blowing money
Domestic Violence using Physical Abuse:
  • Pushing
  • Slapping
  • Hitting
  • Kicking
  • Choking
  • Pulling hair
  • Biting
  • Using Weapons
  • Tying their partner up
  • Locking their partner in a room
Domestic Violence using Sexual Abuse:
  • Raping
  • Physically attacking sexual parts
  • Forcing their partner to perform sexual acts
Domestic Violence using System Abuse:
  • Violating restraining orders
  • Violating child custody agreements
  • Telling lies about their partner to police, courts


  • Isolation:

  •   The man will strongly discourage contact with friends and family. He will insist upon a move to an area far from these people, possibly rural or remote if they are city dwellers.

  • Limiting involvement with others:

  •   He will deny the woman access to a car, not allow her to go to school. If she is employed, he will harass her on the telephone or turn up at her workplace and cause trouble so that she loses her job.

  • Control of finances:

  •   He will take her money, give her an allowance or make her ask for money. She will have to account for all her expenditures and will have no knowledge of the family finances.

  • Putting her down:

  •   The man will call her names, ridicule her, imitate her, tell her she is 'stupid', yell at her, downplay her accomplishments, degrade her dignity and self-worth, make her feel useless and inferior.

  • Playing mind games:

  •   He will deny the abuse ever happened, say 'she caused it', or make light of the abuse telling her 'she has no sense of humor'.

  • Using the children:

  •   He will threaten to take the children away from her.

  • Anger and jealousy:

  •   The man will get angry and jealous and accuse her of having affairs if she even speaks to another man.

  • Statistics About Domestic Abuse

    DID YOU KNOW THAT:
      Approximately 95% of the victims of domestic violence are women.
    (Department of Justice figures)

     
    Every 9 seconds in the United States a woman is assaulted and beaten.
     
    4,000,000 women a year are assaulted by their partners.
     
    In the United States, a woman is more likely to be assaulted, injured, raped, or killed by a male partner than by any other type of assailant.
     
    Every day, 4 women are murdered by boyfriends or husbands.
     
    Prison terms for killing husbands are twice as long as for killing wives.
     
    93% of women who killed their mates had been battered by them. 67% killed them to protect themselves and their children at the moment of murder.
     
    25% of all crime is wife assault.
     
    70% of men who batter their partners either sexually or physically abuse their children.
     
    Domestic violence is the number one cause of emergency room visits by women.
     
    73% of the battered women seeking emergency medical services have already separated from the abuser.
     
    Women are most likely to be killed when attempting to leave the abuser. In fact, they're at a 75% higher risk than those who stay.
     
    The number-one cause of women's injuries is abuse at home. This abuse happens more often than car accidents, mugging, and rape combined.
     
    Up to 37% of all women experience battering. This is an estimated 566,000 women in Minnesota alone.
     
    Battering often occurs during pregnancy. One study found that 37% of pregnant women, across all class, race, and educational lines, were physically abused during pregnancy.
     
    60% of all battered women are beaten while they are pregnant.
     
    34% of the female homicide victims over age 15 are killed by their husbands, ex-husbands, or boyfriends.
     
    2/3 of all marriages will experience domestic violence at least once.
     
    Weapons are used in 30% of domestic violence incidents.
     
    Approximately 1,155,600 adult American women have been victims of one or more forcible rapes by their husbands.
     
    Over 90% of murder-suicides involving couples are perpetrated by the man. 19-26% of male spouse-murderers committed suicide.
     
    When only spouse abuse was considered, divorced or separated men committed 79% of the assaults and husbands committed 21%.
     
    Abusive husbands and lovers harass 74% of employed battered women at work, either in person or over the telephone, causing 20% to lose their jobs.
     
    Physical violence in dating relationships ranges from 20-35%.
     
    It is estimated that between 20% to 52% of high school and college age dating couples have engaged in physical abuse.
     
    More than 50% of child abductions result from domestic violence.
     
    Injuries that battered women receive are at least as serious as injuries suffered in 90% of violent felony crimes.
     
    In 1991, only 17 states kept data on reported domestic violence offenses. These reports were limited to murder, rape, robbery, and serious bodily injury.
     
    More than half of battered women stay with their batterer because they do not feel that they can support themselves and their children alone.
     
    In homes where domestic violence occurs, children are abused at a rate 1,500% higher than the national average.
     
    Up to 64% of hospitalized female psychiatric patients have histories of being physically abused as adults.
     
    50% of the homeless women and children in the U.S. are fleeing abuse.
     
    The amount spent to shelter animals is three times the amount spent to provide emergency shelter to women from domestic abuse situations.
     
    Family violence kills as many women every 5 years as the total number of Americans who died in the Vietnam War.

    Are you in an abusive relationship?

    Has any of the following ever happened to you? 
    Does your partner:
     
    1) Blame you for his or her mistakes?
    YES or NO

     
    2) Prevent you from seeing your family or friends?
    YES or NO

     
    3) Curse you, humiliate you, mock you or say mean things?
    YES or NO

     
    4) Force you to have sex or force you to engage in sex that makes you feel uncomfortable?
    YES or NO

     
    5) Restrain, hit, punch, slap, bite or kick you?
    YES or NO

     
    6) Intimidate or threaten you?
    YES or NO

     
    7) Ever prevent you from leaving the house, getting a job, or continuing your education?
    YES or NO

     
    8) Destroy personal property?
    YES or NO

     
    9) Behave in an overprotective way or become extremely jealous?
    YES or NO

     
    10) Threaten to hurt you, your children, pets, family members, friends, or himself?
    YES or NO

     
    If you answered YES to any of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship.

    Domestic violence and children

    Domestic violence (often called ‘family violence’) can include physical, verbal, sexual or emotional abuse. Children who witness regular acts of violence have greater emotional and behavioral problems than other children. Even very young children can be profoundly frightened and affected.

    Contrary to popular belief, witnessing episodes of violence between people they love can affect young children as much as if they were the victims of the violence.

    Short-term effects of domestic violence

    A child’s response to repeated domestic violence depends on a number of factors, including their age, gender, personality and family role. Some of the immediate effects can include:
    • Blaming themselves for the violence
    • Experiencing sleeping difficulties, such as nightmares
    • Regression to an earlier stage of development, such as thumb sucking and bedwetting
    • Becoming increasingly anxious or fearful
    • Displaying aggressive or destructive behaviour
    • Starting to withdraw from people and events
    • Becoming a victim or perpetrator of bullying
    • Starting to show cruelty to animals
    • Experiencing stress-related illnesses, such as headache or stomach pain
    • Displaying speech difficulties, such as stuttering
    • Misusing drugs and alcohol (in young adults).
    Long-term effects of domestic violence A child growing up in an abusive household learns to solve their problems using violence, rather than through more peaceful means. Some of the long-term effects may include copying their parental role models and behaving in similarly destructive ways in their adult relationships. Children may learn that it is acceptable to behave in a degrading way to other people, as they have seen this occur in the violent episodes they witnessed. Appropriate support and counselling will help children grow up learning not to abuse others.

    Drug and alcohol misuse

    Some parents who are dependent on alcohol or other drugs are unable to care for their children appropriately and may hurt or neglect their children. For some, the addiction is so overwhelming that it takes priority over everything else, including looking after their children’s needs.

    Children need consistency in their routine if they are to develop trust and a sense of security, which parents who misuse alcohol or drugs may be unable to give them. Some of the effects of parental drug and alcohol misuse on the child may include:

    • Not getting all their nutritional needs met
    • Experiencing school and learning problems
    • Developing emotional problems related to anxiety or stress
    • Loss of trust in adults
    • Having an increased risk of mental illness or suicide in later life
    • Developing an increased risk of substance misuse.
    Seek support to stop the violence Domestic violence does not resolve itself. If you seek support to take action against violence, it shows your child that abuse is not acceptable and should be stopped. There are professional organisations that can help both partners to confront and change their destructive behaviours. If the abused partner fears for their safety, or for the safety of their children, it is important to take time away from home as soon as possible.

    See your doctor for advice and referral, or call a parenting or domestic violence helpline. A parent with a substance addiction needs professional treatment, including counselling or medical treatment. In the meantime, keep all harmful substances out of the reach of children.

    How to help your child

    You can help your child emotionally recover from domestic violence in many ways, including:
    • Get support to take action against the violence.
    • Protect children from violence by taking them to a safe place.
    • Tell the child that abusive behaviour is wrong and be a role model for other ways of managing anger and solving problems.
    • Reassure the child that none of the violent episodes were their fault in any way.
    • Tell them how much you love them and cuddle them often.
    • Encourage them to talk openly about their feelings.
    • Get extra help for your child with their schooling.
    • Enlist a trusted adult to provide your child with emotional support.
    • Seek professional help, such as counselling, for all family members.
    Where to get help
    • In an emergency, dial triple zero (000) to call police or ambulance
    • Women’s Domestic Violence Crisis Service of Victoria (24 hour) Tel. (03) 9373 0123 or 1800 015 188
    • Parentline Tel. 132 289
    • Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 551 800
    • Relationships Australia Tel. (03) 9835 7570 – for support groups and counselling on relationships, and for abusive and abused partners
    • Mensline Australia Tel. 1300 789 978
    • Domestic Violence Crisis Centre (national number) Tel. 1800 633 937
    • National Association for Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect (NAPCAN) Tel. (03) 9654 9552
    • Your doctor
    Things to remember
    • Children who witness regular acts of violence have greater emotional and behavioural problems than other children.
    • Some of the immediate effects may include nightmares, anxiety, withdrawal and bedwetting.
    • Seeking support to take action against domestic violence shows your child that abuse is not acceptable and can be stopped.
     
    Original Article

    Children of Abused Parents Have More Behavior Problems

    Judith M. McFarlane, DrPH; Janet Y. Groff, MD, PhD;
    Jennifer A. O'Brien, MA, Kathy Watson, MS
    Pediatrics, September 2003


    Children who witness their mothers being abused can experience a variety of behavior problems, including anxiety, withdrawal, depression, and aggression, say researchers from the University of Texas-Houston Medical School in Houston, Texas.

    Researchers surveyed 258 mothers who had been abused and 72 nonabused mothers as part of a study on treatment of abused women. All of the moms had kids between the ages of 18 months and 18 years old. Mothers noted the types of assaults that had occurred within the past 12 months, and they completed a comprehensive survey of their children's behavior. The child behavior survey asked questions about internalizing behaviors, such as anxiety and depression, withdrawal, and physical complaints like headaches or stomachaches. Mothers also reported whether their children showed externalizing behaviors, such as aggression, attention problems, or rule breaking.

    Children of abused moms had more internalizing problems, more externalizing problems, and more behavior problems overall than children of nonabused moms. These behaviors, especially depression, withdrawal, and anxiety, place a child at higher risk for suicide.

    What This Means to You: A child who is exposed to domestic violence is at risk for behavioral problems, even if he or she isn't directly being abused. Both children and parents in abusive families need help. If you are being abused, call (800) 799-7233 to reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline or talk to your doctor or your child's doctor about what to do.


    Children, Community Violence and Post-Traumatic Stress

    Deborah Wasserman
    Department of Human Development & Family Science
    The Ohio State University
    Carol Ford Arkin, Ph.D.
    Columbus Children's Hospital


    Quick to anger, trouble paying attention, disinterested--these behaviors in children demand adult intervention. Problem behaviors in children derive from many sources. One potential factor affecting too many children today is the physiological and psychological aftereffects of witnessing or being a victim of a traumatic event.

    Traumatic stress comes in many forms and a full range of intensities, as do children's responses to it. Not all children who have experienced or witnessed trauma will exhibit behavior problems. Increasing adults understanding of the effects of trauma hopefully will enable them to better help children who experience problems.

    RESPONSE TO TRAUMA

    Children's responses to trauma may vary according to the source and circumstances of the trauma and the circumstances of the child. Generally speaking, children who experience or witness extreme threat respond with symptoms that fit into four general categories (Terr, 1991; Pynoos and Nader, 1988):
    • They may have strong memories that repeatedly intrude on their normal functioning.
    • They may engage in endlessly repeated behaviors.
    • They may develop trauma-specific fears.
    • They may change their attitudes about friends, family, life in general, and the future. They also may desire to be unaware of their feelings.
    Although these responses tend to be fairly consistent among children who have experienced traumatic stress, the way they manifest can differ substantially. Repetitive behaviors in one child, for example, may be highly aggressive, whereas in another they may be withdrawn or self-injurious. Some children exhibit few, if any, of these symptoms; others become almost completely debilitated, experiencing all of them persistently. In the latter case, children may be diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

    Most children who have experienced trauma will not develop PTSD, although many may demonstrate transitory symptoms. If disturbances persist for longer than one month, parents or caregivers should consult with a mental health professional or pediatrician experienced in working with traumatized children.

    WHAT INFLUENCES CHILDREN'S RESPONSES TO TRAUMA?

    Many factors, often interrelated, contribute to the type and severity of a child's response to traumatic stress. These factors include the persistence of the trauma, the relationship of the child to the perpetrator, the proximity of the child to the experience, the child's support system, and the basic beliefs the child brings to the task of understanding and coping with the trauma. To understand children's possible responses, it is helpful to consider:
    • the child's age,
    • whether the trauma was ongoing or one-time,
    • the child's relationship to the perpetrator,
    • whether the child was a victim, a witness, or connected in some way to the victim,
      adult support,
    • other stress factors affecting the child.
    THE CHILD'S AGE: Children's responses to traumatic stress tend to be consistent with their developmental age. Toddlers may manifest stress in changes in their relationship to their caregivers, either demanding more attention, showing signs of indifference, or both. Their motor activity may change, and they may become more aggressive (hitting, biting, pinching).

    In addition to the behaviors exhibited by toddlers, preschoolers may have physical symptoms, such as headaches, stomachaches, or difficulty using a particular body part. They may engage in endlessly repetitive play; may physically and emotionally avoid any reminders of the incident; or may demonstrate fear, sadness, clingingness, regressive behaviors, and feelings of shame regarding their vulnerability. Children also may enter a dissociative state, which observers often describe as "being in a world of their own" or "being out of touch."

    School-aged children typically are more susceptible to traumatic events outside the family and their effects on their caregivers, friends, and their community. They may also be more adult-like in exhibiting their sadness and other mood-oriented symptoms, such as anxiety, depression, guilt, increased inhibition, and hypervigilance. These states can result in changes in play, loss or change in interests, return of old or onset of new fears, sleep disorders, difficulty concentrating, and lack of initiative. School performance and learning may suffer. Often symptoms may mirror those of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and may respond to ADHD treatment (Schwarz and Perry, 1994).

    In addition to the symptoms experienced by younger children, adolescents may exhibit identity, eating, and personality (including multiple personality) disorders and seizure-like states. Suicide attempts, substance abuse, self- mutilation, delinquency, truancy, and destructive sexual behaviors also may occur.

    WHETHER THE TRAUMA WAS ONGOING OR ONE-TIME: If the trauma was acute and unanticipated, as might be the case with a drive-by shooting, the child may experience acute and disturbing disruptions of thought patterns. If the trauma was chronic and anticipated, as is most often the case with sexual or physical abuse, researchers and clinicians report a more chronic absence of feeling, sense of rage, and generalized sadness along with fear (Terr, 1991). The two types of trauma can also overlap, resulting in a mixture of symptoms.

    THE CHILD'S RELATIONSHIP TO THE PERPETRATOR: Traumas perpetrated by individuals whom a child has learned to trust or depend on create different effects than those perpetrated by strangers. Generally speaking, the more personal the relationship between perpetrator and victim, the more severe the symptoms of the victim.

    WHETHER THE CHILD WAS A VICTIM, A WITNESS, OR CONNECTED IN SOME WAY TO THE VICTIM: Studies of one-time, acute events reveal that those physically and emotionally closest to the event's epicenter will have the most severe and longest-lasting symptoms. That is, victims who are emotionally, cognitively, and physically involved with the event and the perpetrator can be expected to respond more strongly than those who are physically, emotionally, or cognitively more distant (Pynoos and Nader, 1988; Schwarz and Perry, 1994; Terr, 1990). Relationship to the event may involve the victim's sense of control over the event; victims with less control may have a stronger symptomatic response (McCormack, Burgess, and Hartman, 1988).

    ADULT SUPPORT: At the time of a traumatic event, attention and energy may be focused on the victim, perhaps making it difficult for children who are distressed by witnessing the event to receive the support they need. Moreover, adults who have close relationships with a child victimized by violence may be hampered by their own distress about the occurrence.

    Difficulty receiving the support they need may be compounded for children who manifest their grief differently than adults. Children's sadness may be less apparent and less sustained. Some researchers have found that many children have never spoken to anyone about their grief reactions. These researchers surmise that because children's sadness tends to be more hidden, parents and teachers may have more difficulty appreciating the nature and intensity of children's grief reactions (Pynoos and Nader, 1988).

    OTHER STRESS FACTORS AFFECTING THE CHILD. Although children have a wide range of response to various traumatic stresses, one fact seems to be well-established: rather than building children's resilience by giving them more expertise, recurrent or multiple traumas multiply the difficulty children experience (Fitzpatrick and Boldizar, 1993; Pynoos and Nader, 1988).

    PROVIDING SUPPORT

    In addition to providing "first aid" (see section at the end of this article) at the time of the trauma, parents and caregivers can provide ongoing support to children in the ways outlined in the remainder of this article.

    HELPING CHILDREN REGAIN A SENSE OF CONTROL: Traumatized children have experienced themselves as helpless and not in control. Healing includes recognizing that those feelings occurred at the time of the trauma, but need not continue into the present. Barbara Oehlberg, in her discussion of "reempowerment" in Making It Better: Activities for Children Living in a Stressful World (1996), suggests asking children open questions, such "Then what happened?" or "I wonder what makes the daddy say that?" to help them process a story and gain a sense of mastery. Oehlberg's book also provides a number of open-ended activities intended to help children draw from their own resources to make sense of their world.

    HANDLING DISRUPTIVE BEHAVIOR:Although adults may encounter difficulties when faced with agitated, defiant, or aggressive children, remembering that they are struggling and need adult help is extremely important. Behavior problems are unlikely to decrease through scoldings or appeals to "common sense," and harsh discipline is harmful and inappropriate. On the other hand, overly permissive parenting is not likely to help a child who needs guidance and help with coping. Children need consistent, loving support with clear limits and positive discipline to enforce them.

    UNDERSTANDING REPETITIVE PLAY: The play of traumatized children may include acting out aspects of the event or themes from it. Some children may engage in endless, unvaried, repetition of the same play. Although self-expression may be constructive, caregivers need to balance between excessively encouraging or discouraging these activities (Schwarz and Perry, 1994). Caregivers should supervise play, for example, and be attuned to the possibility that it can become too disturbing for the child or for the child's playmates.

    TUNING INTO THE CHILD'S NEEDS AND PACE FOR DEALING WITH STRESS: While providing opportunities for children to express themselves, parents and caregivers need to be careful not to push too hard to extract a story or otherwise pressure the child. Allow children to feel safe, accepted, and ready to talk at their own pace. On the other hand, putting the burden solely on children to bring up their feelings, or avoiding the subject altogether and assuming children will "work things out on their own" does not give children the support they need. If adults never broach a subject, children may think that it is somehow taboo or that their feelings are abnormal or bad and should not be discussed.

    GOING BEYOND THE NUCLEAR FAMILY: Families that have experienced trauma may find it helpful to reach outside the family for supportive relationships for themselves and their children. An adult mentor, for example, can make an enormous difference in a child's life.

    COPING OVER TIME: As children mature, gaining more sophisticated emotional and cognitive abilities, they may reprocess an earlier trauma. Caring adults should be aware of this possibility, and be ready to listen and possibly make referrals to appropriate professionals, whenever the need arises.

    SPECIAL SECTION

    FIRST AID AT THE TIME OF STRESS


    Coping with the traumatic stress of a child at the time of the stress is critical; unaddressed traumatic stress increases the likelihood of the child developing PTSD. The following suggestions by Pynoos and Nader (1988) include a list of "first aid" for trauma victims:
    1. Provide support, rest, comfort, food, and the opportunity to play or draw.
    2. Reassure children that they are safe and that you will help them.
    3. Reassure children that the event was not their fault.
    4. Help children understand what has happened by giving them opportunity to talk about the event. Clarify, then reclarify any existing confusions.
    5. Give children the opportunity to talk about their feelings. Providing emotional labels for common reactions is helpful. Reassure children that it is okay for them to be upset.
    6. Do not insist that children talk before they are ready or more than is comfortable for them.
    7. Help children understand that the event is over, especially in the presence of physical reminders of the incident.
    8. Encourage children to let their parents, teachers, or other adults they trust know about what happened.
    9. Provide consistent and reassuring caretaking, such as picking children up from school or letting children know the whereabouts and availability of a significant adult.
    10. Understand that children may exhibit behaviors they have already grown out of (for example, bedwetting) and tolerate those behaviors for a limited amount of time.
    11. Help children dealing with death understand its finality. Do not talk about death with euphemisms, such as "He went away" or "She is sleeping."
    REFERENCES

    Fitzpatrick, K. M. & Boldizar, J. P. (1993). The prevalence and consequences of exposure to violence among African-American youth. JOURNAL OF THE AMERICAN ACADEMY OF CHILD AND ADOLESCENT PSYCHIATRY, 32, 424-430.

    Garbarino, J. (1995). RAISING CHILDREN IN A SOCIALLY TOXIC ENVIRONMENT. Jossey-Bass; San Francisco.

    Heergaard, M. (1991) WHEN SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAPPENS: CHILDREN CAN LEARN TO COPE WITH GRIEF. Woodland Press, Minneapolis.

    Oehlberg, B. (1996). MAKING IT BETTER: ACTIVITIES FOR CHILDREN LIVING IN A STRESSFUL WORLD. St. Paul: Red Leaf Press.

    Pynoos, R. S. & Nader, K. (1988). Psychological first aid and treatment approach to children exposed to community violence: research implications. JOURNAL OF TRAUMATIC STRESS, 1(4), 445-473.

    Schwarz, E. D., & Perry, B. D. (1994). The post-traumatic response in children and adolescents. PSYCHIATRIC CLINICS OF NORTH AMERICA, 17 (2), 311-327.

    Terr, L. C. (1991). Childhood Traumas: An outline and overview. AMERICAN JOURNAL OF PSYCHIATRY, 148, 10-20.

    Sunday, December 13, 2009

    Child Protection in Families Experiencing Domestic Violence

    Child Abuse and Neglect User Manual Series

    Author(s):  Office on Child Abuse and Neglect., Caliber Associates.
    Bragg
    Year Published:  2003


    Chapter 2
    The Overlap Between Child Maltreatment and Domestic Violence

     
    Over the past few decades, there has been a growing awareness of the co-occurrence of domestic violence and child maltreatment. Studies report that there are approximately between 750,000 and 2.3 million victims of domestic violence each year. Many of these victims are abused several times, so the number of domestic violence incidents is even greater. According to a national study by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, approximately 903,000 children were identified by child protective services (CPS) as victims of abuse or neglect in 2001. Increasingly, service providers and researchers have recognized that some of these adult and child victims are from the same families. Research suggests that in an estimated 30 to 60 percent of the families where either domestic violence or child maltreatment is identified, it is likely that both forms of abuse exist. Studies show that for victims who experience severe forms of domestic violence, their children also are in danger of suffering serious physical harm. In a national survey of over 6,000 American families, researchers found that 50 percent of men who frequently assaulted their wives also abused their children. Other studies demonstrate that perpetrators of domestic violence who were abused as children are more likely to physically harm their children.
    Rates of Domestic Violence
    Domestic violence measured by the National Crime Victimization Survey (NCVS) includes rape or sexual assault, robbery, and aggravated and simple assault committed by a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend. In 2000, about 1 in every 200 households acknowledged that someone in the household experienced some form of domestic violence. There is no statistically significant difference in this rate over the prior 6 years. As with other crimes measured using the NCVS, a household counted as experiencing domestic violence was counted only once, regardless of the number of times that a victim experienced violence and regardless of the number of victims in the household during the year. The following statistics represent reported cases.
    Characteristic of the household Percent of households that experienced domestic violence
    Caucasian . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.4%
    African-American . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.5%
    Hispanic . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.5%
    Other . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.5%
    blank cell
    Urban . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.5%
    Suburban . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.4%
    Rural . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.4%
    blank cell
    Northeast . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.3%
    Midwest . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.7%
    South . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.4%
    West . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.5%

     
    Household Size blank cell
    1 person . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.4%
    2 to 3 persons . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.4%
    4 to 5 persons . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 0.5%
    6 or more persons . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
    . . . . . . . . . . . 1.0%

     
    Domestic Violence by Type of Crime and Gender in 2001
    blankcell Female Male Total
    Rape or sexual assault
    41,740
    blank cell
    41,740
    Robbery
    44,060
    16,570
    60,630
    Aggravated assault
    81,140
    36,350
    117,480
    Simple assault
    421,550
    50,310
    471,860
    blank cell
    Overall violent crime
    588,490
    103,230
    691,710

     
    The Co-occurence of Child Maltreatment and Domestic Violence

    An estimated 3.3 to 10 million children a year are at risk for witnessing or being exposed to domestic violence, which can produce a range of emotional, psychological, and behavioral problems for children. This estimate is derived from an earlier landmark study that found approximately 3 million American households experienced at least one incident of serious violence each year. The broad range of this estimate highlights the fact that the exact number of domestic violence incidents is unknown, and there sometimes is incongruence or a lack of agreement about exactly what constitutes "domestic violence."
    One study estimates that as many as 10 million teenagers are exposed to parental violence each year. This estimate comes from a survey in which adults were asked "whether, during their teenage years, their father had hit their mother and how often" and vice versa for the mother. The survey found that about one in eight, 12.6 percent of the sample, recalled such an incident. In these cases, 50 percent remembered their father hitting the mother, 19 percent recalled their mother hitting the father, and 31 percent recalled the parents hitting each other.

    These estimates are based on research that identified maltreated children who accompanied victims of domestic violence to shelters and identified adult victims via CPS caseloads. Additionally, research examining the relationship between victims and their own use of violence indicate that they are more likely to perpetrate physical violence against their children than caretakers who are not abused by a partner or spouse. Children who witness domestic violence and are victimized by abuse exhibit more emotional and psychological problems than children who only witness domestic violence.

    Current data regarding the co-occurrence between domestic violence and child maltreatment compel child welfare and programs that address domestic violence to re-evaluate their existing philosophies, policies, and practice approaches towards families experiencing both forms of violence. The overlap of these issues may be particularly critical in identifying cases with a high risk of violence, such as the relationship between domestic violence and child fatalities in CPS cases. A review of CPS cases in two States identified domestic violence in approximately 41 to 43 percent of cases resulting in the critical injury or death of a child. A number of protocols and practice guidelines have surfaced over the past decade to provide child welfare and service providers with specific assessment and intervention procedures aimed at enhancing the safety of children and victims of domestic violence.

    Children's Exposure to Domestic Violence

    Children who live in homes where a parent or caretaker is experiencing abuse are commonly referred to as "child witnesses" or "children who are witnessing" domestic violence. The term "children's exposure" to domestic violence, however, provides a more inclusive definition because it encompasses the multiple ways children experience domestic abuse. Although caretakers frequently believe they are protecting their children from witnessing their abuse, children living in these homes report differently. Researchers have found that 80 to 90 percent of children in homes where domestic violence occurs can provide detailed accounts of the violence in their homes. Research studies have proliferated regarding children's exposure to domestic violence, the problems associated with witnessing, and the protective factors that influence their responses to the violence. Children's exposure to domestic violence typically falls into three primary categories:
    • Hearing a violent event;
    • Being directly involved as an eyewitness, intervening, or being used as a part of a violent event (e.g., being used as a shield against abusive actions);
    • Experiencing the aftermath of a violent event.
    Children's exposure to domestic violence also may include being used as a spy to interrogate the adult victim, being forced to watch or participate in the abuse of the victim, and being used as a pawn by the abuser to coerce the victim into returning to the violent relationship. Some children are physically injured as a direct result of the domestic violence. Some perpetrators intentionally physically, emotionally, or sexually abuse their children in an effort to intimidate and control their partner. While this is clearly child maltreatment, other cases may not be so clear. Children often are harmed accidentally during violent attacks on the adult victim. An object thrown or weapon used against the battered partner can hit the child. Assaults on younger children can occur while the adult victim is holding the child, and injury or harm to older children can happen when they intervene in violent episodes. In addition to being exposed to the abusive behavior, many children are further victimized by coercion to remain silent about the abuse, maintaining the "family secret."
    The Effects of Domestic Violence on Children
    Children who live with domestic violence face numerous risks, such as the risk of exposure to traumatic events, the risk of neglect, the risk of being directly abused, and the risk of losing one or both of their parents. All of these can lead to negative outcomes for children and clearly have an impact on them. Research studies consistently have found the presence of three categories of childhood problems associated with exposure to domestic violence:
    • Behavioral, social, and emotional problems—higher levels of aggression, anger, hostility, oppositional behavior, and disobedience; fear, anxiety, withdrawal, and depression; poor peer, sibling, and social relationships; low self-esteem.
    • Cognitive and attitudinal problems—lower cognitive functioning, poor school performance, lack of conflict resolution skills, limited problem-solving skills, acceptance of violent behaviors and attitudes, belief in rigid gender stereotypes and male privilege.
    • Long-term problems—higher levels of adult depression and trauma symptoms, increased tolerance for and use of violence in adult relationships.
    Children also display specific problems unique to their physical, psychological, and social development. For example, infants exposed to violence may have difficulty developing attachments with their caregivers and in extreme cases suffer from "failure to thrive." It should be noted that there also are limitations and uncertainties to the research since some of the children in such studies do not show elevated problem levels even under similar circumstances. Preschool children may regress developmentally or suffer from eating and sleep disturbances. School-aged children may struggle with peer relationships, academic performance, and emotional stability. Adolescents are at a higher risk for either perpetrating or becoming victims of teen dating violence. Reports from adults who repeatedly witnessed domestic violence as children show that many suffer from trauma-related symptoms, depression, and low self-esteem.

    Possible Symptoms in Children Exposed to Domestic Violence
    • Sleeplessness, fears of going to sleep, nightmares, dreams of danger;
    • Physical symptoms such as headaches or stomachaches;
    • Hypervigilance to danger or being hurt;
    • Fighting with others, hurting other children or animals;
    • Temper tantrums or defiant behavior;
    • Withdrawal from people or typical activities;
    • Listlessness, depression, low energy;
    • Feelings of loneliness and isolation;
    • Current or subsequent substance abuse;
    • Suicide attempts or engaging in dangerous behavior;
    • Poor school performance;
    • Difficulties concentrating and paying attention;
    • Fears of being separated from the nonabusing parent;
    • Feeling that his or her best is not good enough;
    • Taking on adult or parental responsibilities;
    • Excessive worrying;
    • Bed-wetting or regression to earlier developmental stages;
    • Dissociation;
    • Identifying with or mirroring behaviors of the abuser.
    Children's Protective Factors in Response to Domestic Violence
    Studies documenting the types of problems associated with children who are exposed to domestic violence reveal a wide variation in their responses to the violence. Children's risk levels and reactions to domestic violence exist on a continuum where some children demonstrate enormous resiliency while others show signs of significant maladaptive adjustment. Protective factors such as social competence, intelligence, high self-esteem, outgoing temperament, strong sibling and peer relationships, and a supportive relationship with an adult, are thought to be important variables that help protect children from the adverse effects of exposure to domestic violence. In addition, research shows that the impact of domestic violence on children can be moderated by certain factors, including:
    • The nature of the violence. Children, who witness frequent and severe forms of violence, perceive the violence as their fault. Because they fail to observe their caretakers resolving conflict, these children may undergo more distress than children who witness fewer incidences of physical violence. The frequency with which they witness positive interactions between their caregivers also affects them.
    • Coping strategies and skills. Children with poor coping skills are more likely to experience problems than children with strong coping skills and supportive social networks. Children who utilize problem-solving strategies targeted directly at the source of disagreement demonstrate fewer maladaptive symptoms. Emotion-focused strategies, however, are less desirable because they often target internal responses to a stressful situation, which can result in less effective coping methods (e.g., children fantasizing that their parent's are "getting along").
    • The age of the child. Younger children appear to exhibit higher levels of emotional and psychological distress than older children. Age-related differences might result from older children's more fully developed cognitive abilities to understand the violence and select various coping strategies to alleviate upsetting emotions.
    • The time since exposure. Children are observed to have heightened levels of anxiety and fear immediately after a recent violent event. Fewer observable effects are seen in children the longer time has past after they have witnessed the violence.
    • Gender. In general, boys exhibit more "externalized" behaviors (e.g., aggression or acting out) while girls exhibit more "internalized" behaviors (e.g., withdrawal or depression). In addition, boys identify more with the male abuser and girls identify more with the female victim; both may continue these roles throughout life if the issues are not addressed.
    • The presence of child abuse. Children who witness domestic abuse and are physically abused demonstrate increased levels of emotional and psychological maladjustment than children who only witness violence and are not abused.
    Professionals Responding to Child Maltreatment and Domestic Violence: In Search of Common Ground

    Although adult and child victims often are found in the same families, child protection and domestic violence programs have historically responded separately to victims. The divergent responses are largely due to the differences in each system's historical development, philosophy, mandate, policies, and practices. As a result, these differences have led to variations in desired outcomes and practice methods for child welfare caseworkers and service providers who lack a mutual understanding of one another's mission and approach when addressing the co-occurrence of child maltreatment and domestic violence.
    Several key debates stemming from these differences have limited collaboration between the two fields. For CPS caseworkers, whose legal mandate is the protection of the abused child, responding to domestic violence has been widely regarded as a peripheral issue. Alternatively, service providers have primarily focused on pursuing safety and empowerment for adult victims. The differing opinion about whose safety is paramount has led to misconceptions and critical accusations by both systems. Child welfare advocates have charged service providers with discounting the safety needs of children by focusing primarily on the adult victim who also may be neglectful or abusive towards the children. Conversely, some service providers accuse child welfare caseworkers of "revictimizing" victims of domestic violence by placing responsibility and blame on adult victims for the violent behaviors of perpetrators or charging the adult victim with "failing to protect" the child. Furthermore, interactions with the perpetrator are markedly distinct for each system. CPS's growing emphasis on a family-centered approach may sometimes compel caseworkers to engage perpetrators, who are either biological parents or caretakers of the children, in efforts aimed at creating healthy and stable families. In contrast, service providers often view separation from perpetrators as a desirable intervention until the safety of all family members is assured.

    Despite their differences, child welfare advocates and service providers share areas of common ground that can bridge the gap between them, including:
    • Both want to end domestic violence and child maltreatment;
    • Both want children to be safe;
    • Both want adult victims to be protected—for their own safety and so their children are not harmed by the violence;
    • Both believe in supporting a parent's strengths;
    • Both prefer that children not be involved in CPS, if avoidable.
    Additionally, men historically have not been actively involved with CPS or domestic violence agencies in working to make the necessary behavior modifications that will facilitate change on these issues.

    The Different Responses to Families Experiencing Domestic Violence

    As previously discussed, children respond in varying degrees to domestic violence, and researchers caution against holding a unilateral position that children witnessing domestic abuse constitutes child maltreatment or warrants CPS involvement. However, the complexity of the research regarding the intersection between domestic violence and child maltreatment has led various social service providers and policy-makers to believe that every child exposed to domestic violence is at severe risk for harm and warrants formal or mandatory intervention. Some States are considering legislation that broadens the definition of child neglect to include children who witness domestic violence. Expanding the legal definitions of child maltreatment, however, may not always be the most effective method to address the needs of these children in an already overburdened CPS system. It is an unrealistic expectation that CPS investigate every report of children living in a home where domestic violence occurs. However, CPS should screen every report for domestic violence and refer to specific criteria or agency protocol when determining if the referral warrants further investigation. Furthermore, a CPS investigation is typically labor intensive and invasive in the lives of families.

    Communities can better serve families by allocating new as well as existing resources that build partnerships between CPS, service providers, and the wide network of informal and formal systems that offer a continuum of services based upon the level of risk present. In fact, a number of national, State, and local initiatives throughout the country are demonstrating that a collective ownership and intolerance for abuse against adults and children can form the foundation of a solid, coordinated, and comprehensive approach to ending child maltreatment and domestic violence in their communities. Chapter 6, "Building a Collaborative Response for Families Experiencing Domestic Violence," provides specific examples of promising practices and programs that have implemented community-wide collaborations to address co-occurring child maltreatment and domestic violence.

    There are families experiencing domestic violence where CPS involvement is necessary. CPS agencies are required to intervene in cases where child exposure to domestic violence meets the State or local legal definition of child abuse and neglect and in instances where children, in addition to adult victims, are physically or sexually abused. Presenting risk factors associated with potentially dangerous and lethal forms of domestic violence also will require intervention by CPS. Parental substance abuse and mental illness are two examples of risk factors that can increase the threat of harm to children who witness domestic violence. In cases where there are several risks to children's safety, CPS caseworkers should address the multiple needs of these families. Relevant services are discussed later in this manual.

    There are some situations, however, where child protection efforts to secure the safety of children can and should occur without a formal determination of abuse or neglect. After completing a comprehensive assessment of the nature and severity of the domestic violence and its impact on child safety, CPS may elect to refer a family to community-based services rather than substantiating a CPS case. CPS agencies who adopt this alternative response to domestic violence and child maltreatment may find it to be a more manageable and effective approach in assisting victims of domestic violence who have not maltreated their children, but who need help in securing safety and protection for them. Additionally, both the children and the victim are often better served by voluntary, and therefore less stigmatizing, community-based services.



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